Well its Halloween next week so here’s a little taster to get you in the spirit… Do you like Halloween?
But for those that do like a bit of it. I say to you, ‘Happy Halloween’ you sad twat. Here’s a spooky story that’ll not frighten the life out of you.
‘Harry the HillBilly’ had an old campervan without an engine, for rent on his hillbilly land. He advertised it in the local paper, The Hillbilly Hill News. From the beginning of his advert, he had lots of interest. But he refused everyone that enquired as he knew exactly what sort of tenant he had in mind. He was hoping & waiting patiently, to rent it out to a female traveller. But to date he has had no such luck.
Harry the HillBilly is very angry at his bad luck & decides instead of waiting for his intended target to come to him, he’ll venture off his hillbilly land in search of a female traveller.
Here’s Harry when he’s angry,
He thinks the best form of action to hunt his target is to go out looking for a hitch hiking female traveller. Easy targets in hillbilly land!
So he formulates his devilish plan methodically & gets ready to put it into action. He waits till dark then hits the roads in his hillbilly pick-up truck in search of a wandering wanderlust woman.
It doesn’t take him long to find the female traveller of his devious dreams. He spots her performing a strange hitch hiking side show.
High on the hard stuff is his 1st thought. But still a tasty treat of a traveller & she’ll do nicely.
This is Wendy Wanderlust here, at her hitch hiking best.
Harry the HillBilly stops by the side of the road & offers her a lift. When Wendy Wanderlust gets in he asks, “where to?” to this she replies, “anywhere.” Which is music to Harry’s ears. He rattles off his proposal of the campervan for rent on his hillbilly land. Wendy Wanderlust wasn’t planning on sticking around in this scarey hillbilly town but decides to accept the offer for a weeks stay as the rent was so cheap.
Marvelous! Harry thought, & drove back to show Wendy her new place of residence.
On the 1st night Harry the HillBilly stalked his target, in his newly made spy hide near the campervan.
By the 2nd night which was Halloween, he decides its time to get out & put his plan into action & fulfill the fantasy of his devious dreams.
In his devious dreams. He plans on jabbing & stabbing,
Cutting & gutting,
Then eating Wendy Wanderlust in a midnight feast.
Before he gets to the campervan. Wendy Wanderlust shouts. ‘Oh Harry! I’m making a Halloween dinner tonight. To thank you for this wonderful place of residence, so do come round at 10 minutes to midnight.”
Shocked by this, Harry ponders for a moment, & decides to wait till then as 10 minutes would be enough time to complete his murderous task & still enjoy Wendy Wanderlust as a midnight feast. So he heads back for an hours kip.
Harry the HillBilly arrives at the campervan at 10 minutes to midnight prepared for his delicious midnight feast of Wendy Wanderlust. He knocks on the door & Wendy lets him in. To his surprise she hasn’t even cooked a meal. In shock he shouts, “whats going on here?”
& locks the door telling him to chill & sit down. Harry sits down in a state of shock. Unable to think or even move.
Wendy Wanderlust attacks.
She jabs & stabs,
Cuts & guts,
& eats Harry the HillBilly. Enjoying every moment of her Halloween midnight feast.
Once her belly is full she’s desperate for the toilet. Feeling Harry run right through her.
After that. She works on the next part of her plan & cuts Harry the HillBilly’s face off, nailing it on top of her own. Taking his identity.
Wendy Wanderlust is now Harry the Hillbilly & advertises the campervan for rent. In search of her?, him?, shim’s next victim. Re-branding it, in honour of her idol.
The legend of Halloween’s Harry the HillBilly lives on. Victim after victim.
& the moral of this spooky story is,
Its not just them hillbilly, serial killer, drivers who pick up hitch hiking travellers that you have to watch out for. Sometimes travellers can be just as dangerous. So beware who you target because that target might be in search of their next victim too.👺
Stay Safe Out There Travellers! 😝